Was the decision to leave yours or your friend’s? Just fate? Separating from a friend can be difficult to handle either way. Some even say ending a friendship can be as difficult as ending a romantic relationship. Worse than a breakup.(1)
Understanding friendship breakups can help you move forward and ease your pain.
Friendship breakups can feel so badly because we don’t know what to say writes clinical therapist Miriam Kirmayer, who specializes in young adult and adult friendships.
“Whatever the reason is for the dissolution of a friendship, the common thread is that we often don’t know if we should have a conversation with that friend. And if we do decide to address it, it’s hard to know what to say,” she adds.
Sometimes the cause of friendship breakups is a factor that is beyond you and your friend’s control. It may be due to distance or an opportunity for growth. Or, you and your friend simply have chosen different life paths or styles. You can’t find the words to bridge the gap.
“We don’t want to express our needs and have them rejected,” Kirmayer explains. We tend to keep our feelings bottled up instead of being more precise in what we want and what we are expecting. The consequence is we feel the friendship isn’t working. We allow it to end naturally.
A friendship doesn’t have the same option as a romantic relationship where the possibility exists to stay friends. Ending a friendship has nowhere else to go.
Friendship breakups can be confusing. They can be unexpected, too. That’s why they can hurt so much.
Here are some suggested ways to cope after separating from a friend:
⦁ Acceptance. The reason for the friendship breakup may simply be beyond you and your friend’s control. Sustaining friendship, for instance, can be hard if separated by great distances. Accept you got to walk your journey on your own and then meet new friends along the way.
⦁ Evolve. Though you may have been used to dealing with your daily struggles with your pal by your side, realize this could be the time for you to grow and become the person you want to be.
⦁ Saying farewell to a friend and wishing them well is all right and it can help ease up the pain. You can say it’s not a total goodbye. And that you are hoping to see your friend again. (2) Despite the uncertainty of that, a grain of hope can do wonders.
Farewell Quotes for Friends
Life is complicated, and circumstances sometimes can be cruel. Distance shouldn’t ruin true friendship. Send one of these quotes:
The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be. Maybe we’ve lived a thousand lives before this one and in each of them we’ve found each other. And maybe each time, we’ve been forced apart for the same reasons. That means that this goodbye is both a goodbye for the past ten thousand years and a prelude to what will come. Don’t be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before we can meet again and meeting again, after moments or a lifetime, is certain for those who are friends. Don’t be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetime, is certain for those who are friends. Friends are like stars even when you can’t see them you know they’re always there. A memory lasts forever, never will it die… true friends stay together and never say goodbye… We only part to meet again. Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation. You have been a friend through thick and thin, in joys and sorrows you have been by my side. I shall be so lonely once you leave…farewell dearest friend. Saying goodbye doesn’t mean anything. It’s the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it. I believe that the best friends would not say goodbye to each other. Therefore, accept this farewell message as a mere formality. Farewell my friend! Even though you are going away you will still be a core part of my everyday life. First I used to hang out with you all the time, and now I will miss you all the time. Goodbye. How lucky I am to have known someone who was so hard to say goodbye to.
And Our Expert Says…
- Recall some of your favorite fun times you shared with your friend. Let them know that even though they’re leaving your city, these memories will be permanently parked in your heart.
- Brainstorm up some fun ways you can stay connected. For example, you might plan to do regular “morning Zoom coffees” instead of your usual coffee shop meet ups. Or maybe you can watch your favorite Netflix show together – while on the phone.
Goodbye Friendship Quotes
Do you remember the song from “The Road to El Dorado?” Elton John sings friends never say goodbye. Remain in touch and preserve your friendship.
Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened. This is not a goodbye, my darling, this is a thank you. Thank you for coming into my life and giving me joy, thank you for loving me and receiving my love in return. Thank you for the memories I will cherish forever. You may be gone from my sight, but you are never gone from my heart. Please don’t forget me and all the things we did. Why can’t we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn’t work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos. So for now I say goodbye to this chapter of my life and I look forward to what comes next. I feel sick, I feel low, I feel depressed and I feel sad – when I think about how I will miss you real bad. I feel miserable, I feel unwell, I feel down and I feel lonely – when I think about how life will be without my bestie. Goodbye. I am looking forward to not keeping in touch with you! So long! The story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye, the story of love is hello and goodbye…until we meet again. You are going to get many good things in life; but in that treasure, keep a place for friends like us. Cheers to your new life. Goodbye, my friend, goodbye. My dear, you are in my heart. Predestined separation promises a future meeting. It is amazing to see how strangers became best friends within a short period of time. I hope the two friends would not become strangers in the future.
Quotes about Friends Leaving
Warm and sincere quotes about departing friends can make your separation less painful. Personalize one of these sayings:
I don’t like goodbyes so let’s just say see you soon… If there ever comes a day where we can’t be together, keep me in your heart. I’ll stay there forever. – Winnie the Pooh True friends don’t say goodbye, they just take extended leaves of absences from each other.” It is easy to become friends, difficult to remain friends and hardest to say goodbye to a friend. Sorry, but I cannot do the hardest part. We started with a simple hello but ended with a complicated goodbye. With the wind in our hair and the sun in our eyes, we cherished our friendship as life’s greatest prize. Now that you are going away my life will cease, I will blissfully drown in all the beautiful memories. Goodbye. Promise me you’ll never forget me because if I thought you would I’d never leave. – A.A. Milne As I saw the morning star come up over the mountains, I realized that life is simply a collection of memories. But memories are like starlight – they live on forever. There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart. – Mahatma Gandhi Thank God for all the means by which we can stay in touch. I say goodbye only with the belief that we will never really be far. Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes. I would have never said hello to you many years ago, if I knew that saying goodbye would be so traumatic. Bye buddy, I will miss you.
Bye Bye Cards and Images for Friends
Take a look at these cool bye-bye cards. Feel free to share these images on Twitter or Facebook: