Joke Of The Day For Adults

  • What is Moby Dick’s dad’s name? -Papa Boner
  • What do pimps and farmers have in common? -They both need a hoe to stay in business.
  • What’s the best part of gardening? -Getting down and dirty with my hoes.
  • How do you eat a squirrel? -You spread its little legs.
  • How do you stop a clown from smiling? -Shoot him in the face!
  • Why do Jewish men like to watch porno movies backwards? -They like the part where the prostitute gives the money back.
  • Why doesn’t a chicken wear pants? -Because his pecker is on his head!
  • What do you call a lesbian dinosaur -A lickalotopis Q.When do you kick a dwarf in the balls? A.When he is standing next to your miss saying her hair smells nice Q:Why did Tigger look in the toilet? A:Because he was looking for Pooh If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?
  • What do you call a country where everyone is pissed? -A urination.
  • What do you call a Chinese midget? -Tai Nee
  • What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? -You didn’t hold the pillow down long enough.
  • What’s worse than finding a Justin Bieber CD in your boyfriend’s bedroom? -Finding a box of tissues next to it.
  • Why do Asian girls have small boobs? -Because only A’s are acceptable
  • What do you call a gangster hobbit? -YOLO SWAGGINS
  • What’s the difference between a retard and a pencil? -The Pencil will eventually get the point.
  • What’s the difference between a penis and a bonus? -Your wife will always blow your bonus! A recent survey shows that sperm banks beat blood banks in contributions…HANDS DOWN! If you force sex on a prostitute, is it rape or shoplifting? you choose.
  • What do you call Iron Man without his suit? -Stark naked!
  • What’s the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? -Your mom can’t take a joke.
  • Why is santa so jolly? -Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
  • What’s the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? -A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Joke Of The Day For Adults