Funny Sick Jokes

  • Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nevermind. It’s too long.
  • What do you call a nanny with breast implants? A faux-pair.
  • Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer? The grass tickles their balls
  • What’s the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks!
  • What do the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you’re in deep shit.
  • Why is being in the military like a blow-job? A. The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
  • Why don’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is
  • Did you hear about the African American girl who was quiet during the movie? She wasn’t
  • How is a woman like a road? They both have manholes.
  • What do women and noodles have in common? Both wiggle when you eat them.
  • Why does the Easter Bunny hide Easter eggs? He doesn’t want anyone knowing he’s been fucking the chickens!
  • What do you call a party with 100 midgets? A little get together.
  • What do you get when you cross a dick with a potato? A dictator.
  • If the world is a Jacket where do poor people live? In the hood.
  • What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts that a 25 year old doesn’t? Her navel.
  • What type of bird gives the best head? A swallow.
  • How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
  • What do you call an afghan virgin Mever bin laid on
  • How do you get tickets to the Tampon 100? Pull some strings.
  • What’s the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks.
  • What do you do with a year’s worth of used condoms? Melt them into a tire and call it a goodyear.

Funny Sick Jokes